Tai Chi Chuan - Do THIS!

Tai Chi Chuan – Do THIS!

Learning this most rarefied of arts is subject to many many pitfalls. I just learned something my teacher (Maggie Newman) has been saying for YEARS. And yet it just registered. As if I had heard it for the very first time. You see, my understanding of the words was incorrect. I interpreted them one way and she meant them a different way. And somehow when she demonstrated, I thought my misinterpretation was still valid, as if I was doing what she was demonstrating and doing what she was saying. Though she was very clear (I now see) it hadn’t been clear to me. The computer sort of deleted reality and created a default program.

Recently another aspect of tai chi just mentally and physically registered – a similar realization. I’ve heard the words for years, but suddenly I have a new interpretation (and execution) of those words. Like YEARS of not getting it. I have to wonder why I bother to stick with this since the error rate in tai chi is very very high.

I guess because when I do get it, there is a thrill that can’t be beat. It is the thrill of the small articulate detail that gains in meaning if only because it took so long to make the shift and understand those words and feel a deeper level of relaxation or integrated execution. And I have to wonder, what else do I not see? What else do I not get?

Embedded here is a lesson in life that frankly I don’t care to learn. By this I mean I wish that what is being demonstrated in tai chi – and my experience in tai chi – was not also true in life. Alas, I think it is!

What is generally true is that by keeping at something, it will/can change and get better. What I really want in life – how I wish life operated – is to arrive at some place and not have to be so attentive and persistent in my effort. My vision of “effortlessness” is more like going on automatic pilot where everything falls into place without any thought, focus, attention or effort. (We are trying to be effortless in tai chi.) I want to say, “It can’t be THIS hard to get from here to there can it?”

Well, it depends on how deep you want to go. Yes, it can be THIS hard if you want to continue to go into something deeply.

How often do I hear of a musician or classical singer claim that they are always in the process of learning, of becoming? I secretly react to this statement with a snicker and subtly think that they say this out of false modesty. As if they don’t REALLY mean what they are saying; it is a crowd pleaser statement. A humble diva is a good thing to be. Often they are already successful when they say this, so I wonder if they need to improve at all. Haven’t they arrived?

Well, yes, they have. They have arrived at the place that inspires them to want more. And in the case of the singer (and the tai chi practitioner) wanting more has to come from a place of love for the art itself and some internal relevance. If it comes out of ego or self aggrandizement, the art will eat you up.

Which brings one back to the art of life. New word, same deal. To get more, you have to give more (to you, to them, to it.) And if it isn’t out of love (for you, for them, for it,) life will be very very painful.

It sounds cliché to put it into terms like this. “Love” is a fuzzy word, loaded with cultural nonsense. For me, love in this instance is a desire to fully absorb and be one with the art, to submerge the self and become the art. To let the art become you. And in doing so, you join with others who have the same desire.

“Desire” has a bad rap in some circles. But I’d like to suggest that this desire is 70-30: 70% desire to give to that art and 30% desire for enjoyment of giving to that art and any treasures that may result. Love is the lubricant; it’s not an object that you own. It only keeps the joints well oiled and allows a smoother ride….