Tai Chi Chuan – Push Hands, Keep It Real

Tai Chi Chuan – Push Hands, Keep It Real

Where to begin?

I often hear from various partners about the pushes they have felt or perceived from some master.  They then lament that Master achieved success in three years in terms of learning a great push but that they have not yet achieved this feat.

And I am left with, OK, what next?

It seems this lament leaves you stuck where you are, thinking you too should have this skill in three years.  And in the meantime, these dreamy partners don’t attend to what they are doing right here and right now.  They think that they just need to keep at it.  As if time spent doing it will create success.  Practice makes Perfect (when in fact Practice makes Permanent!)

It is very helpful to be pushed by those that have great pushes.  But the process of observation and self observation in relation to that great push is what is essential. 

So here you are working with your classmate and they give you a shove.  You scoff – that was a lousy push, not the push of Master in the least!  We all start from those not very masterful pushes.  Why scoff?  It doesn’t really help you and it doesn’t help them.  Actually, it detracts from the moment and changes the focus to some push far far away in the future, not this lousy push of right here and now.  What is helpful about judging someone’s push?   Does this make you superior?

Think about what you believe are useful skills in pushing.  Think of a way to work on this skill.  Let go of success or getting the push perfect.  Even let go of Master.  Find the pieces that make sense to you today and give it a shot.  Then reflect on what happens.

Some have great skill in executing bad pushes.  They are hard to deal with.  Worse, they think that they are good because most of those they encounter can’t deal with their bad push.  My point here is that a good push is not really measured by your own perception of success. It is measured by the feedback that partners give: did it feel good? Smooth? Inescapable? Inevitable? Rooted?

It is hard to find a partner that can give good feedback.  Mostly they are repeating what someone told them or what they imagine their future push will be like.  Good feedback is also rooted in the here and now.

Scoffing is not feedback.  It’s judgement.  Scoffing at others is a poor way to learn.  Dreaming that Master learned this in three years is a waste of your time.  Look, study, experiment, get feedback, feel what they are doing and how you are responding and be here now with what is truly going on.  Then you may get somewhere.  Don’t judge your partner, or measure their skill.  It doesn’t matter.

I had a most frustrating interaction.  My partner is good at blocking and rooting in order to stop me from finding a push.  And he is fairly strong physically and full bodied.  I lost it.  My response mentally was that I could see his flaws and surely I should be able to push this body.  Not so. I got aggressive, hard, used stiff arms.  He then got harder.  It was a wonderful wrestling match.  After, I felt rotten about the whole situation.  Everything I believed in that moment was thrown out the window. 

The alternative (in this case, the road NOT taken)?  Forget winning or “getting” him, give it up. Just listen to what is going on and see what I can see.  Pushing him is not on the checklist for the moment.  I learn much more by letting him win, letting him push, letting him turn me where he wants to turn me.   And then noting how open, relaxed, and smoothly I connect with him.  Or not. That’s about the best I can do for now and that is a way to learn something.  If I want feedback, I might ask for it.  Or I might just feel what is going on now and see how I can integrate principles into the game.

You learn far more from getting pushed than from giving pushes.

“That push sucked,” your partner says.  “Master’s push was so soft, so smooth, like an ocean wave, it was incredible and powerful, it sent me flying.” 

“Oh? Can you show me?”

“Well, no, I can’t do it.”

Is this helpful?

I’m not dismissing the great pushes out there. It is crucial to feel a great push. But it’s ridiculous to hold your partner to that standard if you yourself cannot do it.